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Houston matchmaker gives a lesson on the 5 love languages

How to use your love language to connect better with your partner

HOUSTON – One of the most common issue in any relationship is the communication barrier, but you can improve your relationship, one love language at a time.

Matchmaker, Amber Neal, helps you identify the 5 love languages in order to give and receive love the right way.

“If you are the kind of person that you receive your love by getting gifts, and they forget a holiday, you are crushed. So, you need to love which your love language is,” said Neal, who founded Marridate, a new private social club for couples to cure the divorce rate.

Here are the five love languages, according to the international bestseller “The 5 Love Languages” by Dr. Gary Chapman.

1. WORDS OF AFFIRMATION

This language uses words to affirm other people their love. This is good for people that love praise.

“Some people need compliments. Some people need to know ‘I look beautiful,’ or ‘You’re proud of me,’ or those kinds of things. If someone doesn’t praise you when you do something big, that will really bother you,” said Neal.

2. ACTS OF SERVICE

People who prefer this language enjoy a partner that shows them they care by making thoughtful acts of kindness, like taking out the trash, picking out the dry cleaning, washing their car, etc.

“We’re all working now, we’re all busy and it is the little things. A fourth of couples divorced over household chores last year. Acts of service really help; if you already are in the relationship, this will really help you go back and maybe fix some of the things you’re having problems with,” said Neal.

3. RECEIVING GIFTS

To these folks, you spoil them with gifts, because for them, it's the thought that counts. Get custom made gifts for these lovers, it adds an extra level of meaning and care.

“In a regular relationship, it really is the thought that counts. It could be something little, like, ‘I need a vase,’ and they come home with a vase on Valentine’s day. That’s a love language,” said Neal.

4. QUALITY TIME

This love language is all about staying connected in a world full of distractions. You can express love by giving your partner your undivided attention, listening and conversing.

“Quality time is super important in today’s world where everyone is so busy, but specifically with people that have really busy careers, entrepreneur, business owners, people that travel a lot. When you get that quality time, because time is money, if you give them that time, to them is how they’re expressing it. But you need to clarify if you have the same love language that it matters to you as well.

5. PHYSICAL TOUCH

For people who navigates towards this love language, nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate touch and a constant intimate connection with their partner to feel loved.

“Some people aren’t good at articulating their feelings, so, it’s really good if you’re able to just touch and be affectionate. The thing about that is, if that is your love language, you will feel emotionally starved if your partner is not affectionate and give you love that way,” said Neal.

To learn your love language, take the quiz here.


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