Laticia Thomas is getting married next month and says she's had three panic attacks planning the perfect day.
“It gets to the point where I can barely breathe,” Thomas said.
A perfectionist at heart with an affection for subtle glam, Thomas now knows the devil is in the details and she's overwhelmed with grad school, a full-time job, a wedding and a baby. She’s planning to throw her son’s first birthday party about a month before she walks down the aisle.
“So, all this had to be done before his birthday,” she said.
Award-winning wedding planner Shaun Gray said it's most important for overwhelmed brides to prioritize.
“If you don't have a venue yet, don't be looking at invitations because you need to get the big stuff done first so you can celebrate some successes before you start worrying about the little details,” Gray said.
His top suggestions for brides to enjoy the planning process is:
1. Make time to be a couple
“Do things that don't have anything to do with the wedding because if you make it so focused on the wedding it's not going to be a celebration of you two coming together, it's going to be this chore that you can't wait to be done with,” he said.
2. Include the groom
“The bride has to understand that the groom could probably care less if it's taffeta or satin linen,” Gray said instead, “Ask him what kind of liquor he wants at the bar, ask him to be involved in picking out his groom's cake … he'll be excited about it and have an enjoyable experience.”
3. Research vendors
“Instead of spending all that time on Pinterest finding that cute centerpiece, spend that time researching whether it's [on] Better Business Bureau or the big wedding sites,” Gray said.
Bonus tip! Gray recommends….
4. Don't take your phone to bed
Gray said if you must have it in the room, create a separate email account for wedding planning and do not look at it when you should be resting.
“Do one last quick check through and then don't look at your wedding stuff until the next morning,” he said, “It will all be there in the morning.”
Gray said every bride, like Laticia, have busy lives. So, he recommends getting a wedding planner even for “day of” planning, which he said is a four- to six-week contract and much less limited to upscale weddings than typically thought.