Monday's episode of the ABC dating show saw Madison tell Peter about her expectations for him as they headed into fantasy suites -- sharing that she wouldn't feel OK with him sleeping with the other women. While she insisted it wasn't an ultimatum, it kind of was, and Peter's admission he had been intimate quickly put his romance with Madison at risk.
After his overnight dates with Hannah Ann and Victoria F., Peter sat down for his date with Madison, and picked up the conversation where she had left it after the prior rose ceremony.
"I just want to start off being very honest with you. It's in regards to the last time that we talked... I have been going through a lot in this past week, because of what you did say to me. I know a lot of this revolves around the whole intimacy thing, and honestly, I've been torn because the fact of the matter is I have two other relationships right now," he began.
"I honestly wasn't really planning on sharing all that with you that night, but I walked away from that conversation feeling really discouraged and really disappointed and the last thing I wanted to do was put you in an uncomfortable situation, or make it seem like it was this ultimatum, or thing that you can't do this or you can't do that. And I'm sorry if I didn't share more of my heart that night. But like, coming into this week is really hard for me for a lot of different reasons, and tonight, I want to be as honest about everything that I can be," Madison replied.
She continued: "Growing up, I made a commitment to myself, and I decided that I wanted to save myself for marriage, and for me, I see it as the day I say 'I do' to the person I spend the rest of my life with is the day that he's getting all of me, body, soul and spirit, I'm his. And I look at relationships, and not both people are going to have made the same life decisions, and I don't expect that for you or for anybody, but I do expect at this point to be honest about the expectations that we have and that's what I'm trying to do."
Peter, known for his four times in windmill with Hannah Brown, told Madison the obvious: "That's not me. We're different in that regard." "I respect the hell out of you for making that commitment to yourself, to save that for marriage, and that's such a beautiful thing in my eyes," he shared. "Obviously I'll always respect your views on that, and I'm not saying that we have to have the same [outlook], but what are your expectations for me, then?"
"For me personally, I wouldn't be able to say yes to an engagement and continuing to move forward if you have slept with the other women. And I'm not in any way trying to come across as like, judgmental or hold something over your head," Madison said. "At the same time, those are just -- those are my expectations that I have in life."
Peter, shocked, asked Madison to clarify exactly where she stands. "You would want to possibly give up forever with each other because of something that happened this week, with another relationship of mine?" he asked. "You'd be able to walk away from this?"
"I just can't like, wrap my mind around in a week from now, if you're down on one knee, and six days before that, you slept with somebody else. I just can't wrap my mind around that. I can't," she explained. "I'm not asking you to give me details, but I do kind of need.... it's not comfortable for me to ask, I hope you know that."
"I'm not comfortable at all right now," Peter revealed.
Madison said she realized that, and has tried to put herself in Peter's shoes.
"I just don't know how to like, let go of the things that I need in a relationship. I don't want to feel like a bad person for the standards that I have. I'm so proud of the person that I am and the choices that I've made and the standards that I have, and it's been so fricking hard in this, because I've had to look past a lot of things -- no, I'm not OK with a guy to be kissing other women. But I've fought and I've gotten here, and I've gotten to this place and I've sacrificed a lot and I've compromised a lot, and I've really pushed myself in a lot of ways that I wouldn't normally for anybody else," she tearfully said. "But you're worth it, and I'm fighting and I'm still fighting. But this is one thing that... that's why I voiced it to you."
"For me, I don't want this to feel like it's all about sex right now, but this is really a big thing right now for us. I mean, I don't know how else to do this, but I'll just be very honest and I won't give any details, but I have been intimate, and I can't lie to you about that," Peter confessed. "I look at us, and I think about every single moment that we've shared together and how amazing it's been, and how I 100 percent can see you and I together at the end. But I just have to be honest to you, coming into this week, I could see that with other people too, and I hate that I can say that to you, but that's the truth too."
That last confession was all Madison needed to hear. She excused herself from the table and walked away, leaving Peter alone to cry it out.
"I feel really, really hurt and really let down. He knew coming into this week, because I made it really clear, that there was a chance that he could lose me if he made certain decisions and he made them anyways," she said to the camera. "I'm so frustrated with him. I'm so mad at him!"
Peter eventually dried up his tears and went after Madison, trying to fix things.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. ... I know how fricking tough this is for you," he said. "I can't lose you. Say something."
"I felt just like, really hurt in there, and like, I can't change who I am. I can't change what I believe in, what I stand for, what I need," she shared, revealing how "torn" she is between what she needs in a relationship and how she feels for Peter.
"Don't walk away. Don't," Peter begged her. "I know I'm not perfect, not even close. If you can honestly see you and me together forever, do not walk away. Please don't. I know that I hurt you and I'm sorry for that, but please don't walk away from this. What do you need to do?"
"I don't know," Madison responded, as Peter gave her a kiss on the head, and she left the conversation.
Fans will have to wait for next week's episode to find out what happens. The Bachelor airs Mondays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC.