Check Traffic

Check Traffic
Live Cameras, Conditions

°

Homepage / Family
Text Size

Can Boomers Get Back Into Dating Game?

Woman Worries About Lies, Deception

POSTED: Tuesday, March 3, 2009

DoubleTake advice column
    Dear DoubleTake,

    I am a 56-year-old woman who has been out of the dating game for more than five years.

    I recently have been feeling that I need to start dating again, but in the world of deception and lies, I feel uncomfortable.

    I find it hard to talk to the opposite sex. I seem to clam up. I don't know what to say. I start to put up my guard.

    I have been hurt in the past, and I can't seem to forget how much deception I dealt with. I would like to meet someone on a social basis without any intimacy starting off.

    But I can't seem to stop being afraid. Am I afraid of myself? Any suggestions?

BETTY SAYS:

Start slowly. Instead of getting out into the "dating scene" right away, try signing up for classes that interest you or join a community club. After a few weeks, or months, perhaps you'll feel more comfortable talking to strangers.

If that goes OK, but you don't found anyone to ask out on a date, you may want to increase your prospects by signing up for an online dating service. These sites can be very effective in matching you with the right type of person.

Say that you do meet someone special online and decide to go out on a date. Make boundaries for yourself. Decide which topics of conversation are going to be OK and don't agree to a second date with anyone who seems sketchy.

Unfortunately, there's no test to find out if someone is deceptive. But if you take things step by step and get to know people at your own pace, there's a better chance that you will pick up on the little clues that we tend to overlook in the throes of lust. Just take your time, keep your standards in check and try to have fun on your dates.

EDDIE SAYS:

The world of deception and lies didn't start during your break from dating. Even if you were married for a long time before that, you always faced the risk of finding someone who would break promises or break your heart.

I may be a bit more cynical than Betty, generally, but I think most of the time people aren't trying to hurt others. They may be a bit thoughtless, or what they need may not be what you need, but the vast majority of people do not try to lie or cheat to get what they want. They just want to be happy, too.

So, yes, keep caution in mind at all times. But don't let it block you from finding someone to be with.

  • Disagree With Double Take? Offer Your Own Advice

    • Do you need a second -- and third -- opinion about a problem in your life? Ask Double Take and you'll get two points of view: one from Eddie, a married family man in his early 30s, and one from Betty, a single woman in her 20s.

    E-mail questions to doubletake@ibsys.com. A new column is published every other Tuesday.

    To be considered for publication, please keep letters to fewer than 300 words. If you feel more background information is needed, consider adding it as a postscript. Because of the volume of the mail received, Eddie and Betty offer advice only to the letters that are chosen for publication.

    Double Take writers are not trained psychologists and their responses should not be taken as a substitute for professional advice. Double Take reserves the right to edit submissions.     Double Take Archive:
    More Advice ...

    Copyright 2009, Internet Broadcasting. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.
    The story Can Boomers Get Back Into Dating Game? is provided by LifeWhile.

    The views expressed are not those of Click2Houston.com, KPRC or its affiliated companies. This is a community moderated forum. (Please note the 'Like' and 'Report' tabs.) By posting your comments you agree to accept our Terms of Use.

    Comments

    blog comments powered by Disqus

    Sponsored Links

    Links We Like

    Sponsored Content
    Most sellers think they know at least a ballpark figure for their house, but most are way off. Get a true gauge on just what your home is worth. More

    Find out what a sputtering economy and an increasingly difficult to crack job market means to you. More

    It was bound to happen. There are now applications for your cell phone that can help you avoid speeding tickets as well as traffic jams. Drive carefully. More

    Great sex doesn't happen without some effort, especially in long-term relationships. Find fun ways to add passion to your relationship. More

    Severe Weather
    Affected Counties

    Most Popular

    Marketplace

    • AutoClick to Expand

    • JobsClick to Expand

    • WomenClick to Expand

      • Healthy Living In Your 40s

        Your guide to looking and feeling your best.

      • Manage Stress, Find Balance

        The idea of living a balanced life may seem like an oxymoron. Yet working toward balance and self-care is key to feeling in control and more joyful at home and work.

      • Weight & Exercise: The Right Mix

        Being healthy is related to how well you take care of yourself. But it’s never too late! A woman can learn new, healthy habits at any age.

    • InsuranceClick to Expand

      • Auto Insurance Quotes

        Simply enter your zip code and get great deals on your car insurance from the top companies. Click here and start saving today!

      • Health Insurance Quotes

        No matter where you live, you shouldn’t have to pay too much for health insurance. Your zip code is all you need and we’ll do the rest to find you great insurance rates.

      • Home Insurance Quotes

        Your home is your most valuable asset. So make sure you have coverage that fits your needs and doesn’t break the bank.

      • Life Insurance Quotes

        What would happen to your family if you were suddenly gone? Don’t leave their future to chance and find top quality life insurance before it’s too late.

      • Business Insurance Quotes

        Don’t take chances when it comes to insuring your business. To get the best rates from top companies in your area just enter your zip code.

    • HomesClick to Expand

      • Real Estate 2010 -- Will It Be Better?

        There's little doubt that 2009 was a brutal year for many in real estate while for others it was a buying opportunity. What about 2010? Where are we headed?

      • 6 Common Home Pricing Mistakes

        When selling a home, your pricing strategy can make or break your chances for a quick sale. Price your home right by avoiding these mistakes sellers often make.

      • Staging Tips That Sell

        There is a lot you can do to get your home ready that doesn't cost much money; it just takes time and hard work.

      • To Sell Or Not To Sell

        Due to the current market, should you sell or not. Should you act as your own agent?

      • 5 Ways To Stop The Foreclosure Process

        Missed more than three mortgage payments, or your lender has filed a Notice of Default (NOD)? Even at this stage, there are 5 strategies to stop the foreclosure process.

    Set as Homepage | Back To Top | SearchSearch
    Post-Newsweek Stations, Inc. Internet Broadcasting   Partners:   CNN   washingtonpost.com   NBC   MSNBC
    ©2009, Internet Broadcasting Systems, Inc.

    Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy  |  Terms of Use  |  Advertising  |  Microsoft MapPoint Terms of Use  |  Microsoft Privacy Statement  |  Site Map